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I second that.....
Goody
Goody
Going Through Separation And Divorce
- Thread starter BoydWilliam
- Start date
Help Support Prospecting Australia:
Simon_49
Simon J Kormendy
Hi Boyd,
I think I know how you feel mate, I was in an online relationship with a young lady from England, anyway, I ended up finding out that she got together with one of her workmates, and got pregnant by him, apparently the guy didn't want to know about the kid he fathered, but what hurts me the most is that the young lady went behind my back and I only found out when she told me after it happened, so I decided to just forget about it and walk away, she keeps asking me to come back to her, but what she did destroyed my trust in her, funny thing is, she would get upset if I told her I was going somewhere that that happened to have women there, like a live band concert, but to her it seemed perfectly okay for her to see someone behind my back, I saw the hypocrisy in the whole thing.
You're not alone mate.
I think I know how you feel mate, I was in an online relationship with a young lady from England, anyway, I ended up finding out that she got together with one of her workmates, and got pregnant by him, apparently the guy didn't want to know about the kid he fathered, but what hurts me the most is that the young lady went behind my back and I only found out when she told me after it happened, so I decided to just forget about it and walk away, she keeps asking me to come back to her, but what she did destroyed my trust in her, funny thing is, she would get upset if I told her I was going somewhere that that happened to have women there, like a live band concert, but to her it seemed perfectly okay for her to see someone behind my back, I saw the hypocrisy in the whole thing.
You're not alone mate.
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Simon_49 said:
Hope you're not that foolish in the future.
You have zero responsibility to her. Indeed she takes zero responsibility for her own actions. Pay for the raising of this other mans child if you wish but that is the mothers responsibility, not yours. Most women understand how contraception works just as much as they understand how alimony/childcare works. Don't be another statistic. Let her reap the benefits of her lifestyle choices without the state getting you to foot the bill.
Has she got a good looking younger sister without baggage?
I'd check there first lol
jwal
Jason
Hey Lads,
So it has been just on 12 months since I woke up to the news that she wanted to split up after 10 years together, and almost five years of marriage.... (recap complete).
Since then this is what happened to me - some of you playing at home may already know:
- My kids (22 & 25) decided I needed to go with them to Bali
- Went, and met a stunning woman from the US
- Went back and forth meeting her in Bali a couple of times
- Packed up everything, quit my job, moved with her to Bali in July
- We were great for each other for that moment in time. She left and went back to the US in September. No income, homesick etc - wasn't working for her
- She was my fast forward button getting through the loss of my previous relationship, and if the above didn't happen we would still be kicking on
- I came back to Melb in December for the Christmas/New year period (and it is too wet in Bali)
- My former employer kept me on as a contractor and I can work remotely (love the internet)
- I am still in touch with the woman I met in Bali (even as recent as today)
- I have taken some time to figure out what the f I want - goal not yet achieved
- I do know that I can do what I want, although something still stops me
- Along with my contracting job I am working on about 4 other projects, I still get to go prospecting even though I sold most of my stuff (wish I didn't do that, renting a detector is not cheap)
- I have been in touch with my friends more often, went snorkelling the other day, catch up for dinner, phone calls, and more time with my boys
The negative, well, let's say I am missing female company
I swipe away on Bumble and Tinder apps, get a few chats going, but when it comes to the catching up part - I go cold... I can only imagine because I am not really ready.
Once my days were dark, but the sun shines every single day - I have to see the sun go down every night - love a good sunset, I might take a look and admire for a few seconds, or I will sit somewhere quiet and watch it go down while thinking about what I will do tomorrow, and what I got done today, ,and what i am THANKFUL for.
I am back off to Bali mid Feb, but it will probably only be until June, but who knows - I haven't planned that far ahead.
keep talking boys - this smacks us all in the back of the head, and when a separation is tied in or forces a bit of a midlife adjustment (not crisis), this is a great place to get it out - or if you aren't a typer, get into the bush with some of the boys over the fire and a drink - it is amazingly cleansing when you can share - you aren't always looking for advise,, sometimes just an ear to hear you....
Let your biggest upset be that you didn't find any yella, and that was only cos you didn't walk over it!
So it has been just on 12 months since I woke up to the news that she wanted to split up after 10 years together, and almost five years of marriage.... (recap complete).
Since then this is what happened to me - some of you playing at home may already know:
- My kids (22 & 25) decided I needed to go with them to Bali
- Went, and met a stunning woman from the US
- Went back and forth meeting her in Bali a couple of times
- Packed up everything, quit my job, moved with her to Bali in July
- We were great for each other for that moment in time. She left and went back to the US in September. No income, homesick etc - wasn't working for her
- She was my fast forward button getting through the loss of my previous relationship, and if the above didn't happen we would still be kicking on
- I came back to Melb in December for the Christmas/New year period (and it is too wet in Bali)
- My former employer kept me on as a contractor and I can work remotely (love the internet)
- I am still in touch with the woman I met in Bali (even as recent as today)
- I have taken some time to figure out what the f I want - goal not yet achieved
- I do know that I can do what I want, although something still stops me
- Along with my contracting job I am working on about 4 other projects, I still get to go prospecting even though I sold most of my stuff (wish I didn't do that, renting a detector is not cheap)
- I have been in touch with my friends more often, went snorkelling the other day, catch up for dinner, phone calls, and more time with my boys
The negative, well, let's say I am missing female company
I swipe away on Bumble and Tinder apps, get a few chats going, but when it comes to the catching up part - I go cold... I can only imagine because I am not really ready.
Once my days were dark, but the sun shines every single day - I have to see the sun go down every night - love a good sunset, I might take a look and admire for a few seconds, or I will sit somewhere quiet and watch it go down while thinking about what I will do tomorrow, and what I got done today, ,and what i am THANKFUL for.
I am back off to Bali mid Feb, but it will probably only be until June, but who knows - I haven't planned that far ahead.
keep talking boys - this smacks us all in the back of the head, and when a separation is tied in or forces a bit of a midlife adjustment (not crisis), this is a great place to get it out - or if you aren't a typer, get into the bush with some of the boys over the fire and a drink - it is amazingly cleansing when you can share - you aren't always looking for advise,, sometimes just an ear to hear you....
Let your biggest upset be that you didn't find any yella, and that was only cos you didn't walk over it!
Thanks for sharing jwal.
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Thanks for sharing Jwal..
Goody
Goody
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I personally feel that when you open up and talk about how you are feeling in some way it makes you start to feel better...
See things in a different light...
Plus you no your not the only one that has been there....
Even if is only talking about small things, it is a start..
It is not good for you or anyone to keep bottling it all up...
It's OK to have a cry ....
Goody
See things in a different light...
Plus you no your not the only one that has been there....
Even if is only talking about small things, it is a start..
It is not good for you or anyone to keep bottling it all up...
It's OK to have a cry ....
Goody
Well said champ
Its been 12 months for me too , but Id say Im completely over it now . Only feel for my son .
Lots of prospecting trips , and Bush weekends have cleansed my soul.
Luckily I dont miss female companionship, and enjoy having time to myself and not asking permission to go anywhere !
Keep ya chin up
Regards
Gunter
Its been 12 months for me too , but Id say Im completely over it now . Only feel for my son .
Lots of prospecting trips , and Bush weekends have cleansed my soul.
Luckily I dont miss female companionship, and enjoy having time to myself and not asking permission to go anywhere !
Keep ya chin up
Regards
Gunter
Unfortunately I am now in this part of the forums talking area, can anyone recommend any type of places someone dealing with this can go and maybe talk with others going through it, Im not big for one on one with a doctor type professional but maybe a mens group thing, something around the SW Sydney area?
Cheers guys
Cheers guys
Sorry to hear that. I'm sure there will be some info posted fairly quickly to help you.
Cheers Jaros, its hard but I suppose you try to keep a smile and push on
Been there once.
Thanks Doug
Been there too. Pm me if you need to vent.
as others have said PM if you want mate :Y:
Your GP is your first stop... Just give him a brief 'outline' of whats going on and he/she will get you to do a Questionnaire on how you are feeling.. Be honest in your answers as the outcome of that will govern if they will issue you with a Health Care Plan... Under this plan, you have up to Free 10 sessions with a 'Councillor' of your choice under medicare... Just watch out for the 'Gap' fee some are charging now...
Sorry to hear this...
LW....
Sorry to hear this...
LW....
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I've been lurking on this thread for a bit. Had first counselling session today. What an eye opener that was. The less I say the better lol
From looking at the structure of support services and the gynocentric focus it is blatantly clear that on the whole men are not treated equitably.
From looking at the structure of support services and the gynocentric focus it is blatantly clear that on the whole men are not treated equitably.
